Fast and Fun Wedding Ceremony Script

Fast Wedding
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  • ~8 Minute Ceremony

For those couples who’d rather not stand up at the altar for half an hour, this short marriage ceremony script gets the job done with plenty of personality. While injected with a fair bit of humor and silliness, it also includes all the legal elements required to make things official.

Introduction

OFFICIANT (to congregation):

Family, friends, others who are not quite sure why they’re here, welcome and please be seated quickly. _________ and _________ have requested a short wedding ceremony and as I don’t want to disappoint, let’s not dilly dally!

It’s traditional for the officiant, me, to give a speech about love and commitment and two hearts becoming one, which is medically speaking extremely dangerous, but in the interest of time let me just say: Love, compassion, friendship, playfulness, kindness, stuff like that. Try your best to do all those things as much as you can.

And now let’s zoom past all the boring stuff and get right to the “I do” part.

Declaration of Intent

OFFICIANT (to _________):

You want this guy/gal/person as your husband/wife/partner? To cherish and hold and all the other things they say in the movies?

_________: I do.

OFFICIANT (to _________):

You want this guy/gal/person to be your husband/wife/partner? To cherish and hold and all the other things they say in the movies?

_________: I do.

Vow/Ring Exchange

OFFICIANT (to congregation):

Present the rings…quick before they depreciate in value even more!

Rings are circles, so are donuts, hula hoops and trampolines. What I’m trying to say is let these rings, not only be a symbol of your love for one another but also a reminder to be sweet, have fun and make sure to jump on trampolines every once in a while, together.

(Here, couple may read their pre-written vows as they exchange rings).

Closing Statement

OFFICIANT (to congregation):

I can understand why _________ and _________ were in a rush. You can tell they are so in love they just wanted to be married ASAP! I get it.

OFFICIANT (to couple):

But in this mad dash world with thousands of things demanding your attention 24/7, don’t forget to slow down every once in a while. Enjoy each other – and your new, wonderful life together.

Pronouncement

OFFICIANT (to congregation):

By the power vested in me by the Universal Life Church, yada, yada, yada, I am pleased as punch to officially introduce Mr./Mrs./Mx. and Mr./Mrs./Mx. ___________.

You may now kiss… and please, take your time.